I am not sure how popular Seduce Me The Otome is on Google or Blogger, but I have to be clear about who I am.
On the internet, I go by many different usernames and accounts because I like keeping my private and social life separate. So, to you viewing this page I like using the names: Kennedy (Kes for short), Speckles, or Poison for my online social identity.
I humbly request that if you wish to interact with me please use one of those names to address me.
You can catch me on…
- Twitter @ tealincubusspec
- WordPress @tealincubusspec
- Fanfiction.net @tealincubusspeckles
- Archive Of Our Own @tealincubusspeckles
- Facebook @tealincubusspeckles
- Tumblr @tealincubusspeckles
- 💜┃Seduce Me Amino @PoisonWorld
- Blogger @ tealincubusspeckles
I had once been told that I was a liar because I hide behind many aliases. I suppose that is true to a degree since I use the internet to escape from reality. Being online has taught me the unhealthy habit of leaving social media circles when I find myself becoming toxic to other users. In-person I would not be able to leave as quickly or as freely as I do online. However, even though it is easy to run from situations online, I can not change who I am or how I react to things.
I consider myself a rude person because I react impulsively, speak with my feelings, and write out raw thoughts. I do not care to spare another person’s feelings and only focus on how to express myself to others. My problem is that I am unable to express myself well. I believe this is because I usually avoid my own emotions and prevent others from expressing themselves. Human interaction requires compassion, empathy, and understanding. Qualities can be difficult for me to be conscious of when I feel offended. Due to my own behavior, I can be paranoid and defensive which results in short-lived relationships with others.
As I stated the option I chose when I start causing problems for others is for me to leave. Yet, there are times when I am aware that my statements toward other users were akin to bullying. I bully others wrongly because I was taking out my frustrations against myself onto them. When I recognize my behavior I do seek to apologize and attempt to explain that I could not handle my own thoughts. These interactions usually get sorted in private conversations, but there have been other times when the issue has to be dealt with in a public space. When trying to explain myself in public I often get called out for being rude, unimaginative, disrespectful, and naive. So, maybe I am all of these things because I am judgemental and am not willing to understand another person’s perspective.
Therefore, if a problem has been caused by my reckless antics, I will screenshot my wrongdoings and leave them up for others to judge. I do this because I know when people are angry they want to hold someone accountable for that anger. If they do not feel the person they are angry at is not suffering then they will not feel satisfied. I have been on both sides of the fence of anger, neither side is pretty. But, life is about living through emotions and trying to find sanity after them.
If you have gotten this far, thank you for reading.
You may be thinking this whole page was dedicated to me making an excuse for my past behavior. Unfortunately, that was not my intention. My intention is to warn others about how I react so they can keep their distance from my attacks. Now, you may be saying that giving a warning is just me making an excuse to be rude in the future. Or maybe that I wrote this to say I never intend to improve myself. If that is what you’re saying then yes you are probably right. I cannot convince you to do anything or make you believe anything you do not want to. I hold no power over you just like you hold no power over me. At the end of the day, we either talk out our differences or agree to disagree. Or we pick a fight over the internet for many months and lose sleep that we did not have. In my opinion, Some fights are just not worth having.